first world complaining

I thought I would cope better with quarantine. It’s been ten weeks. We have money, plenty of food, and I’m sheltering with people I love in a home I have enjoyed living in for 40 years.

But I am struggling, as I suppose most everyone is.

I’ve moved through and adapted to several sequential identities since I became an adult: student, teacher, full time stay-at-home mom, full time political activist/volunteer/staffer. The last professional cycle, my years as a research associate at the University of Toledo Urban Affairs Center, ended 7 years ago. Since then I’ve been active as a leader in a couple of non-profits, I’ve served as a mentor to a few young people. I’ve enjoyed learning and teaching in each of those roles, and those roles are how I have defined myself.

One constant in my life for at least 50 years has been making a home for both my family and frequent guests. The first part of that is ongoing, and I really miss the second part. I also miss a social life with John including restaurants, music, and civic events.

I love having my daughter and my granddaughter live with us. But I miss the occasional meal without kids or pets. I miss thoughtful and intelligent conversations with a range of people in a convivial group with good food and drinks that I’ve had the privilege to prepare.

I’m asking myself, as we all are, when those things will be possible again and what can best make up for their absence in the meantime.

Virtual conversations with friends and family are good, and the Facebook Portal my kids bought make that easier and better. Well-written and neither too-heavy nor too-frivolous novels help. Cooking helps, especially baking bread. Gardening helps. As soon as the weather co-operates, being outdoors will help a lot.

Okay, rant over. I took a break. I planted some tomatoes and I removed several sprouted acorns from the herb beds. I can do this.

Thanks for reading.